Nothing in life is perfect, not me or
my family.
I have gay friends, I have a crazy
family and yet to some people my family is not even a definition of crazy. But
I believe our imperfection is what brings us together, with touch of pretence
that makes us look better than other families.
I left the house, sure of no
surprises, no reason to think too much, than to sit down with my sad mother,
and try to make her happy with my wry jokes and talk about the issues in the
family, little did I know of what was waiting for me.
Guess who I met at the hospital?
I've almost forgotten his
existence, and he was the last on my mind anyway.
Let me take your mind back to when I
was still scratching the surface of the secrets in the family, let’s flip the
pages back to ‘episode seven’, Remember the sexy
player guy that tickles my fancy.
Oh yes!
It was him. Collins!
My mom's sugar boy that
makes my clitoris moves with his gorgeous look.
Like I've not seen enough already, I
met him at the hospital, sitting next to my mother, and they were both laughing
like a happy couple.
Come to think of it, my mother is like
ten years older than this dude, Good lord! But Collins is sexy, charming,
lovely smile that exposes his well-constructed white teeth, and his bald head
is a total turn on for me, smooth and shining like the back of a watermelon.
I see why my mum can’t let go, neither
was I able to get over him, I was only caught-up with too many things, I almost
gave him my virginity before I discovered the dirty affair going on between him
and my mother.
Seeing them together triggered some
anger within me, I don’t know if its jealousy or just annoyed, but whatever it
is, I hate them together. How can they look perfectly
together, while I'm dying of loneliness and looking for redemption
for my parents, when they had their own good fun life when they were my
age.
My emotions almost took over me, but
like a good girl that I love to be, I kept my cool, hug my mom, and said hello
to Collins without looking at him, I saw the big surprise on his face, I don’t
know what it was about, my attitude towards him or because the fact that we are
meeting again after a long time in the hospital.
My mom introduced him as her friend and I was introduced
as her only daughter.
Yes! I was a bit bitchy because I
didn't respond very well to his greetings, I rolled my eyes and started punching
the keys on my phone, there was really nothing to do on my phone, but that was
why candy crush was created, and it felt like I was crushing my candy big time,
he was suppose to be my candy.
There was a long silence in the room,
I totally make him feel uncomfortable, and he only word that broke the silence,
was him telling my mom he’s leaving.
A part of me was happy to hear
him leaving, he stood up on his long legs, and I can’t take my eyes from his
egg plant saying hello to me from his tight pants, he bent and pecked my mom's
cheek goodbye, and she patted his back, telling him to come check on her soon,
which he agreed to by nodding his head, he turned to me and chuckled, I gave a
vacant stare at him and watched him turn his back, what a boyish charm,
egoistic and charismatic, his lips are to die for and I wished for a goodbye
kiss instead. It was painful to watch him leave, knowing the clumsiness between
us.
Oh Collins! Back to spin my head 360
degrees and make my clitoris move like a snail trying to find his way.
My mom was not happy with my attitude
and she asked ‘’why I acted that way towards her friend’’, I told her I don’t
like him, and why is she with him?
She laughed and told me ‘’he is just a
friend and when she is ready to cheat on my dad, ‘it won’t be with someone like
Collins’. He’s just a boy I took interest in; I helped him get through his
school since his mother died, and he sees me as a mother figure. So if you want
to get jealous for your father, it’s
not yet the time’’.
The truth is I'm not jealous for
my dad, or my mom, this time it’s for myself, can’t I just do something for
myself?.
After all the bickering, we both got
over the whole scenario and moved on to our mother and daughter moment, it was
a happy one as we talked about almost everything, she told me about other
patients and I told her about my imaginary suitor.
I made-up a story on that just not to kill the fun we are having, I told her about Hakeem...the guy that works at the bank who won’t stop asking me out, and we went on a date few days ago which was a great one, she seems happy about the story and completely bought it.
The happy moment changed when I asked
my mom if there is anything I can do to fix the whole situation between my dad
and her...I know my mom to be a strong willed woman (more like a stubborn mega bitch,
and I'm not going to apologise for describing her the exact way
she is, a Bitch with the big B meaning Bad) and sometimes it makes me not to pity
her, but seeing her vulnerability these days, showed me she is only a woman (not some transgender, no
offence).
Tears rolled down her eyes and she was
totally silent, with her lip tightly closed, looking sadder than faces that
have seen described as sad. I almost regretted asking the question, but I
really need to know.
I wiped her tears with my palms, it
was an emotional moment, I have never felt like this or be in this kind of
state with her, my eyes was filled with tears too, and it took all the strength
in me to hold it back. My mom in her right mind won’t shed a tear or allow me
to touch her face with my hands, (there are a thousand germs on your hands, so
you can’t touch her face with it) but here we are, a crying mother and a
consoling daughter. The emotional minute ended and I just want to tell her to
suck it in because she is a strong woman, but before I could think of the right
word to say to her, she snapped out of it.
She told me how much she loved, and
still love my dad, I can feel the trueness and sincerity in her voice, ‘’her
eyes lit when she mention love for my dad and it was like there was an
invisible fan somewhere that is blowing her hair as she was talking, and I
thought to myself my Diva Mama’’
She said ‘’she is not happy about her
decision to divorce my dad, ‘but the truth is your father is suddenly a dog’
and he is not even good at being one, because ‘he
shits every where I can see it, and I end up cleaning up the mess’, each
time he cheats on me, it comes back with a drama’’.
She sighed, and continued...
‘’There was a woman who claimed to
have HIV and has slept with your father without protection, although we both
tested negative; but we are still waiting for the window period.
Like that was not enough, there was
another woman that threatened to post naked pictures of your dad with her if we
don’t pay her, I paid her with my own money because your father had put all his
cash in some business that time and it was millions.
Now it’s another woman with sex video
with your father, then a gay story, can you imagine my husband sleeping with
another man?
What does he really want?
Deola tell me, what am I to do?, for
the past five years all I do is clean your father’s mess, and yet he doesn't
treat me like his wife, he claims to love me more than himself but all he does
is to hurt and disrespect me.
As much as I want to be with him, I'm tired
of being hurt. I can’t be living my life thinking what your father is
doing, who is about to blackmail him, if he’s using protection or sleeping with
the boy next door. If he can’t get a grip, then I can’t keep being the victim
’’.
I felt her pain and anger, and I
really don’t understand what happened to my dad.
Why five years ago?
Truly five years ago everything was
great except the fact that I was crushing on my father...not anymore though, so
I'm not the only crazy one.
I was happy knowing that nothing
sexual is going on between my mom and Collins, but I still want to be in total
control of the situation, Collins might end up being my mom's boy-toy if I don’t start making sure he
doesn't end up as that now, the thought of it is gross, but I will make sure it
doesn't happen.
I need to talk to father as soon as
possible and speak sense into him, he really needs to stop playing the victim
now, except if there is more I'm yet to know on his own side.
I really had fun with my mom; we
talked about a lot of things, so much for mother and daughter bonding. She
wants me to start getting involved with her business; so once I finish my
masters I can join her company as the young boss, I can’t wait. I know my
future is bright, and I'm going to be controlling many things.
Later that day I got a message from
Collins, asking if we could meet.
You think I said no?
Well I need to keep my frienemies close, and it was a Yes!
We’re meeting next weekend, it seems like a date, and I could really use one now.
It’s ok to be a bitch, said my
mom some years ago.
