I was trying to adjust to my new life, mom still silent on her sick bed, not ready to see or talk to dad, guess that's her new style of dealing with this shock. My dad on the other hand has been silent too and we've not been talking, though he fakes all is well with his normal routine; goes to work, attend meetings, among other things... That's the difference between men and women; men can mask there emotions and just act is totally fine, when his marriage of about twenty five years is about to shatter.
Mom's secret house seems to be an haven for me; peaceful and calm, no more secrets is unfolding and the only prayer I kept saying is for this two adults to get a grip, talk about it and move past it....I know that's not going to be as easy as said, but they are not even trying at all.
I was planning to go see the new movie 'The Perfect Guy' which I believe he doesn't exist anymore, especially since I knew my perfect dad to be flawed with sins, just like his fore-fathers. I really want to see what will make a perfect guy in this movie my friends have been hyping..."oh! Deo, you need to see the perfect guy, Morris Chestnut and Sanaa Lathan was great in it"
All dressed and ready to leave, but still contemplating on adding more powder to the one on my face...wish all this expensive Mac and Mary Kay product can cover the pain inside, then my phone rang.
Guess who?
It was the "the perfect man" (my father), he hasn't call me for a while now, and I wondered what could be going on. The first thing that came to my mind was my mom, I haven't spoken with her today and I hope all is well; could she be dead?
I picked up the call, we exchanged our normal pleasantries...from the way he sounds, I was certain mom is fine, I asked if he was fine. He sarcastically told me he doesn't even know what that means. He said would love me to come over to the house as soon as I can, and I should say hello to Annie for him.
I was surprised all along he thought I was with Annie, he still doesn't know about this secret house my mom kept with me.
Like any good daughter, I told him I will be with him shortly, and the line was off. That call totally changed my plans from going to see the movie, to going to see my dad, but I'm pretty sure what I will get from going to see him, will be better than going to the cinema.
From the state of the house, you can tell a lot is going on; the house look empty even when everything is still the way I left it, it has always been empty but this time it look emptily empty, sadness in the air, all the glow has totally vanished; even with the proper arrangement done by the house keepers.
When dad came out to meet me in the living room, I was shocked, he has lost a lot weight (not that he was fat before), even though he's still handsome, just a little bit out of shape but physically; dad look like a "perfect guy".
Damn! why is he not a model? I wondered.
Damn! why is he not a model? I wondered.
We smiled at each other, he drew me closer and held me so tight!
He smells so good, but I just want to be out of his grip, but after a few seconds, I became relaxed in his warm arms, I wrapped my hands round him, and held him tighter. Oh! it felt so good and that was needed. It was a moment of great relieve for my dad and I.
We let go of each other and I asked him how he was doing....
Maybe I shouldn't have asked that question, 'cos the answer I got wasn't nice at all.
"Your mom filed for a divorce"
It was as if I was hit with a bucket of slush, then slapped and kicked by a strong hand, I was cold inside, and frozen for a while.
I looked deep into his eyes, I saw pain and the stains; it was like a white cloth sprayed with crimson. The whole drama flashed through my eyes and all I saw in front of me was a
"broken black man"
I pitied him and said to myself, "I need to be strong for this family". Both of them ( my parents) are seriously broken and I am going to mend it.
I exhaled, regained my composure and asked him, when and how he got the information.
He said he got it yesterday, my mom's lawyer came to his office to give him the letter, and he doesn't understand why mom is being so dramatic about the situation.
Can you imagine such coming out from a man who had a sex tape with another woman, and is cheating on his wife with a man. Dad didn't just say that.
I asked him why he thinks mom shouldn't go for a divorce after all he has done. Because the last time I checked, he started this whole nonsense when he can't keep his manhood in his pant, and he was even making a video. what was he thinking? Kim Kardashian's brother!
Then a new story came out, and this totally got me and made me realized how uninformed I was with the whole situation. Diary! I had no idea.
Dad told me the problem didn't just start, they have been dealing with some big issues since last year when a someone emailed him some 'sex pictures' of dad and a woman, though it's an old picture but the images are very bad... from the video I saw few weeks ago; that put mom in an hospital,I can tell what those pictures will look like, what I don't know is if its the same woman in the video or it's another.
I became totally dumbfounded when he told me the man demanded for a sum of five million naira or the pictures would be leaked to the public. My dad's body, that is meant for just my mom and maybe and I, will be leaked for every one to see.
"He smiled" and I was beginning to get pissed with his sudden smile and pause from the story, my zeal to know what happened after the whole threat was killing me, the thought of how he dealt with that a year ago that nobody knew about it.
He continued, saying he was unable to raise the money within the time given to him, he got scared and confused, and he had to confide in his wife ( my mother).
"Your mother took control of the whole situation", turned it from my nightmare to hers, that was the woman I got married to, always in control no matter what. She always come out bold, and strong, no time to cry or whine, she was a fixer!
But the woman I saw in the hospital few weeks ago, was not the the woman I married, and now asking for a divorce, something must is wrong, because she was a woman of her words, she told me for better or worse, she will be holding my hand, but now she doesn't want to see me.
Your mom took up the story, she started emailing the man by herself, and she told me not to send or respond to any message from him.
I really don't know what she told him, but she was able to bit the money down from five million naira to two million, and from her own money she paid for it. she saw all the pictures and asked for the original copies from the man, and she also told him to delete every copies she has and never to message me again. I was with her the day she spoke with him on phone, she told him if he ever shows up again in our lives, she will bury him.
She told me not to worry anymore, and she doesn't want to hear anything about it again, it was after everything we traveled to the Hawaii, and we had a lot of fun, that was the end of it, until six months ago.
I was trying to swallow all this and yet there's more that started six month ago.
I lost my breath for few seconds and till now I'm yet to wrap my head round the HIV news he told me someone sent to my mom about him six months ago. A woman claimed to be his mistress and she's HIV positive.
He told me everything was easily solved when my mom took him to the clinic where they both got tested, which the result came out negative, until this lady emailed my mom again telling her she should not be quick to conclude, because she is certain my dad is in his window period; that's the period when the virus manifest itself in the body of an host, and can be detected. which may can take up to six months or less.
Till I figure how to deal with all I heard, I won't be able to say much at this point. So much questions to ask, so much answers and more secrets to be relieved.
I thought I was deep in my family secrets, but now I know I was only scratching the surface, mum and dad are very good at keeping secrets and dealing with some strong issues. So they need to deal with this now, and the more I try to help, the deeper it gets.
I felt bad because all along I have been blaming my mom for many things, not knowing the blows and bullets she has been taking and dodging for the family. She is indeed a strong woman, if only I knew,I wouldn't dug where i didn't bury. I'm pretty sure if I didn't tell her about dad and Fola, she would be home putting things in order.
I saw the perfect guy the next day, which was a Sunday, it wasn't as I expected but it was great, if my family story is to air as a movie, I'm sure it will be way better.
Christmas is fast approaching, and all I want from Santa is for my family to be mended and things to go back to normal, but it seems "crazy is the new normal"
Don't you think?
I still want us to get past this, without a divorce or any public attention.
DEO'S DIARY
