Friday 5 February 2016

DEO'S DIARY, EP17...MOM'S DIARY!


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Dear diary,

 I know it’s been a while! A long while!

The truth is, so much has happened, and at the end of the day it boils down to penning it on you, even though I wish not to put it down or talk about it...with who anyway?.

So much for a family drama, and for the hatred of Satan, Bloody Hell!

I hated it, and I still hate it!

I feel depressed, defeated, crazy, and stupid like an annoying inquisitive bitch! Think of all the names to call me, and I will answer.

Picking from where I stopped, I'm certain, I don’t need to replay the past pages, we both know what has been happening....which was a lot.

‘Sometimes we tell some lies, believing we are saving the one we love, forgetting the hurt and that comes with it, when the truth comes out’.  Actually the cat is out of the bag, and it’s no fun for me knowing that my faultless father is a pathetic liar, he lied to my face many times without blinking, and lit-up his stunning devilish compelling smile and I just believed it...without a single doubt.

It was a bright Saturday morning, the sun came out pretty early; I looked through my window and saw different people from the neighbourhood jogging up and down, single, double, groupies. What caught my eye more, was a fat woman with timber looking legs, struggling with her stocky -self and that didn't stop her from wearing a short, and a blue tank-top, I can tell she was tired but she kept on with her run. I wonder what kept her going, someone of her size; usually give up quick.

She knew she has a problem and not ready to stop, no matter how long it takes her, I’m certain she will rather die exercising to get rid of her extra skin, than sit somewhere acting ‘I love me the way I am’.
It was an eye-opener for me. My family has a problem and I won’t stop until I solve it.

I don’t know how to pray, but I’m damn sure at this point, I need Jesus! So I whispered some words of prayer, and pronto!
My prayer was answered by my merciful creator, ‘’what a merciful God we serve!’’

The miracle was a call from my mom, asking me to come keep her company for the day. That’s not suppose to be a miracle, but since my mom was hospitalised she has never sounded so happy nor asked me to come and keep her company, I was sure it’s going to be a lovely day, with more unravelled secrets to bring the family back to normal or burn it totally to the ground... perfect!

She told me to check her closet for her nail polish box, and bring it along. That totally set my curiosity on fire, because the last time I painted my mom’s nails, we talked for hours, and every minute spent on each finger or toe, is for a new topic; and I imagined some of the topics of discussion like ‘‘I’m divorcing your father, HIV, yada yada’’!

Finding a nail-polish box in this (secret) house, was harder than Deo finding a boyfriend , I practically scattered my mom’s room and this box was yet to be found, {everything just have to be hidden in my family, including a nail polish!}.

But instead of finding this mystery nail-polish box, my eyes caught this shimmering blue-back covered book, I gave it a closer look, and it was a diary... my mom’s diary!

Immediately! My curiosity awakens! ‘’Like a desperate vampire standing next to a pulsating jugular vein of its prey’’. I flipped it open, and the first page headline reads...

“The sad Hawaii holiday, and was dated 27/06/2015’’

I jumped to the first paragraph, carefully reading through every line, I could feel the hurt as I picture the whole scenario in my head.
And in the diary she wrote...

‘’Dear diary,

It was suppose to be a fun, re-bonding holiday for my handsome husband and I, after a huge blackmail drama.

Every day, it seems like I don’t know who this man (my husband) is any more. He was a sweet liar, and now a rootless cheater!

I surfed the internet for where to get the best wine and some sex toys in Hawaii. My plan was to rekindle our love and investing in great spontaneous sex; this was a perfect thought, meant to be a surprise. I had sneaked out of the hotel early to get all this sex toys from the address I got, thanks to Google.



 And yes! The woman in me took over, I got to the first shop, then the second  and it turns out to be a shopping spree, by the time I satisfied my shopping desire, I had spent three hours, even though I was supposed to be gone for just thirty minutes.



Well, I got few interesting things, and thanks to Anna, ‘the American lady at the sex toy shop’, I learnt new sexual tricks, and I believe I got the best lingerie and long fur jacket, ‘according to Anna’s plan’.



She advised I wear the lingerie from her shop and covered it up with just the fur Jacket, wasn’t too comfortable for me (it felt like I was naked) but I've seen it on TV and at this moment, I’m on fire and ready to burn in love just as seen on screen. I was looking forward to some brash crazy sex.

With my vintage wine that cost me a lot of dollars, and my expensive hot pink lingerie, covered with the fur jacket a lot of Bears had to die for, I headed back to the hotel room ‘feeling like Julia Roberts in pretty woman’.

The plan was to have my husband open the door and I will push him hard to the bed. “while he is wondering what is going on, I will order him to get the wine opened and before he comes back, I’ll take off the fur jacket, and spray some whip cream on my belly button, and order him to come lick it off when he shows up”.

The smile on my face was definitely priceless, the elevator divided open, and I walked majestically to the room door, ready to unleash the sexiness in me as planned.

After few knocks, the door was opened, but it wasn't my husband, it was a Spanish room cleaner, I was angry, but I kept my cool, I asked for my husband and he told me my husband called for the room to be cleaned, he stepped out for him to do his work.

This was why I don’t like surprises, you end up shocking yourself.
Right in my disappointment, the unimaginable happened, the Spanish cleaner looked at me and mumbled ‘loca de su marido está en el cuarto con el modelo de la diversión, la piedad’ Meaning (your husband is in room 4 with the model having fun, pity!)

Not knowing I understand Espanola.

At first it was like a joke, but later it hit me, there was this tall back lady that was all over my husband at the beach the night we arrived, without being suspicious, I headed for the room 4, strongly believing it was pathetic of me to believe I will find him there.
Terrified and guilty, I knocked on room four, a husky voice that is definitely not my husband answered,
Who is there!?
I answered in a changed voice ‘room service’, (that has always been the response anyway).
The man mumbled in a language I don’t understand, and after few seconds a half-naked white man opened the door, he looked at me, and I stood there, confused and ashamed.
After few seconds he asked ‘what I wanted?’

I was about to say ‘sorry’, when I heard a soft feminine voice, sarcastically said in an ‘African accent‘ who is there honey, let her join us for the part, then I heard a laughter, that reminds me of my husband, I can’t miss that laugh, I forced my way in, and on the king-size bed, was my husband, naked, looking charming but was later ruined at my presence, with a black lady, she has a pretty smile, not very beautiful, but her cheek bone was perfect.

 They have been engaging in a lot of sexual activities. Half filled bottles of bourbon beside the bed, and three glasses all below half filled, lots of dead cigarette in the ashtray, what a lovely threesome.

I was gone for three hours in Hawaii on our second night, what will happen if I didn't come at all?.

We boarded the next flight to Nigeria and through-out our flight the only thing that was resounding in my head was ‘the sound of my husband’s laughter, it sounds so familiar, and yes! It was exactly like the first day we met’.

Was I over-reacting?
I don’t know how I forgave him, but I would love to believe that I did.
I’m not going to tell a soul, but writing it down, was a great relief to my soul, it was a big weight, and I will carry it for a very long time.

I am not planning to cheat on him, but I came back from Hawaii with a black dildo, it’s been secretly helping.’’


I have flipped through about five pages and I can’t move to the next one any more, now it all makes sense to me. My mom’s boy toy, the dildo, the secret house...everything!

Apparently, I'm not the only one with a diary, mom has one, God help me dad has one too, and I can’t wait to read!

That’s all she wrote, the other pages were blank.
Maybe she has another diary somewhere that will reveal more secrets. I searched everywhere but nothing was found. You only find them when you’re not looking!

Funny! The nail-polish box was on my mom’s desk, it was another miracle, I didn’t like what I found, but it helps me to know where to start the mending of this broken family.

My day continued with the journey to the hospital to see my mom.
It was a day to remember, a lot was heard!

My mission (to save my parents marriage) seem to be getting harder each day, I don't know about other secrets they are keeping, at least now I'm sure that dad is the big devil!


 This Episode is Dedicated to Sley, on your 1000th birthday Jan. 27.  You're such a wonderful Fan!!!